Stress Less When Your Buttons Get Pressed

Stress Less

Being stress-out, is an emotional state, that varies from mild irritation or worry, to intense frustration. Like other emotions, it is accompanied by physiological changes. When you get stressed-out, your heart rate and blood pressure rises — which is why stress management is important.

Stress can be brought on by both external and internal events like a person who rubbed you the wrong way — or a bad situation that took place. It lingers when you obsess over them... 

So, how does one stress-less when your buttons are always pressed? 

I will show you:

Express Yourself

The most natural way to express yourself is to avenge — after all, your goal is to come across as powerful — right? Wrong! You gain power over the situation by gaining power over your emotions. 

Your goal is to reduce your emotional arousal that the person or situation caused. You can’t change what happens, but you can control the impact it has on you (your reaction). You are not fighting a person or situation per-se; you are fighting to improve your response to it — even if you feel you were wronged! 

The best way to express yourself is by acknowledging the disappointment in a humble manner — as opposed to a proudful manner.

Identify Triggers

It’s best to find out what it is that triggers your stress; weather it's a noisy neighbor, someone going into your parking spot — or something bigger like an accident or financial woes. 

Once you identify what is stressing you out, you are in a better position to handle it. I recently was woken by a loud car. Rather than getting all uptight first thing in the morning, I decided to start my day joyfully!

Increase Your Exposure

Did you know that when you expose yourself to your stress triggers, you can learn to control your reaction to them? It's true!  

When we opt to avoid stressful situations, we actually become more irritated by the occurrence of them. As we willingly expose ourselves to what triggers us, we are in a better position to learn how to control our reaction. As you increase your exposure, they become less burdensome and bothersome. 

Control The Controllables

Controlling controllables is the acceptance that things will not go our way. It's realizing, that is is up to us, to make better choices that will lead to desirable outcomes. 

Charles R. Swindoll said that “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.”  Get used to reacting in a positive way lest you be miserable all your life.

Lose The Arrogance

We share this world with many people who desire to control others. There are thousands of people who feel as though people should BE a specific way around them. 

I once witnessed a child who threw a temper-tantrum over a situation that didn't go his way. 

When I confronted him about it, he said his brother made him do it. I explained to him that he did it all on his own — and it's up to him to gain control over how he responds. 

People are not here to make your life easy. If you wish to control others so your life is more comfortable, seek counseling — because that is an indication of an underlying mental condition.

Take Control  

There is one only one person who is ultimately in control of your life — YOU! 

No one else understands you better than you! If you are not happy with your life,  (job, relationship, lack, disorganization, etc.) then do something about it! 

Don’t just sit around — allowing yourself to be all stressed-out.

Have a discussion with that person in the mirror and figure out how to your improve situation. 

Change How You Look At Things

Wayne Dyer once said, “Change The Way You Look At Things And The Things You Look At Change.” When you change how you see undesirable situations — you reduce their negative impact. Rather than you feeling clobbered by them — they end up having little-or-no affect over you! (This is the goal!)

Shift Your Mindset 

If you don't think your job is appealing, shift your mind to think of all the benefits as a result of having it. If you're facing relationship difficulty, seek counseling; try to connect with your partner; communicate and compromise. If that is not possible, terminate the unhealthy relationship. Do what you can to create a better home life for yourself.

If you are experiencing lack, set a budget and stay within it. When things don't add up, it's okay to start subtracting. You don't need to impress others with your possessions - in fact - this mindset is in opposition with true prosperity. Those who have wealth don't want others to know about it.

Take Action 

One of the most frustrating things that causes us to be stressed-out is knowing what you want — thinking about it all the time, but never making it happen. 

Therein lies our excuses for not taking action: 

“there is effort involved; I don't have the money or resources; I don't know where to start; what if I fail; I'm too old; or, after you've tried, — that person is better than me...”

It's better to limit excuses rather than be limited by them!

What you must do when taking action:

1) Increase your confidence — Think of all the times you tried something new and how you succeeded.

2) Increase your motivation — Get excited about it! Think about all the ways you will benefit from this.

3) Have a realistic plan — When you take action, you need to be mindful that there is a process — and nothing happens overnight.

4) Get good at problem solving — Be prepared to face obstacles and be willing to apply solutions. Repeat, repeat, repeat until successful!

5) Never forget that becoming better at anything adds value to your life!

The Take-Away

No matter how good we get, something will come up. The take-away here is about reducing the impact stress has on us, not eliminating it.

When facing difficulty, always know that everything in the end, will be alright. Mulling over disappointment does nothing for you — but hold you to that moment. Rather than giving  your power to the situation, take that power, and apply it to improve your self-worth. 

 

As you practice this, you will triumph over unfavorable situations — and sleep better at night — I know I am!